I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
