No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
