Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
