Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
