So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
