I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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