It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
