I'm pants shitting drunk right now
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
