You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
