What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
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