I want to make a zoo with you.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
