AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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