You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
