You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
