i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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