I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize