Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I need help removing her.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
