Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
