Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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