Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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