it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
