i don't like sucking hair
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize