I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
