So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Sober January is a disaster.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
