Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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