Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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