Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
