Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
