How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
