shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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