I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize