hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
