You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
