how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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