You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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