Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
