he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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