Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
