it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
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