I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
