whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Randomize
