last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
