i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
