Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
