...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
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