ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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