hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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