her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
