I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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