we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
