Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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