"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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